tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14215732383409638692024-03-13T06:29:23.825-07:00DustbunniesGladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.comBlogger978125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-19385433270656551862015-03-21T05:12:00.001-07:002015-03-21T05:12:45.222-07:00Courtney Love at Hyden Wylds...<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: small; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">This was written days after May 01st 2014. It is post 1'000 and the end of this little blog.<br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I had been trying to write a final blog post for some time, but scrapped each; I wanted to conclude but everything I wrote was dwelling on the last few (very difficult) years. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Or looking forward in a desperate attempt to forget the past</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> This isn't the place for it (and, I do love to compartmentalise)... so I was waiting for a high note to end upon.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Last night, I met Courtney Love and saw her play a tiny solo show in Hayden Wylds, a tiny coffee shop in London.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">My friend of near a decade, Charlotte, writes for a broadsheet paper – she was invited to the gig and secured me a plus one, for which I am eternally grateful. It was such a pleasure to spend time with her! Coincidentally, we met on a Hole Forum way back when, and then in person at a gig I played in London. I love it when things come full circle.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">It would take too much space here to express how much Hole mean to me – I first heard them when I was 13 (maybe 14), but I remember it so vividly.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Courtney validated me in so many ways, and I can't emphasise what a powerful and positive influence she had on me at a time when I was so otherwise delicate.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">So many of my closest friends feel it too; one of my only regrets of last night was not being able to have them their too, to hand hold and share it.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">This is the first time I've navigated London on my own; I don't think I've ever been alone or not had someone meet me in the station before; such is my fear of the big city and dyscalculia sense of direction.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">But, I made it, and I made it in; until the kind PR lady finally drew a hot pink cross on my hand I was worried that I wouldn't something was bound to go awry.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The venue was lovely; a small coffee and tea shop, with a vintage room at the back. I arrived early and drank tea beforehand; pinching myself to check it was real. Eventually everyone was ushered outside so chairs and tables could be moved and equipment set up; Courtney arrived in a car and said ‘HEYYYY!’ to me and Charlotte – at this point I melted. I love her cigarette voice and broad smile.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The press (and, yours truly) were ushered back in; occasionally showing Charlotte my hands, so she could see how much they were shaking (pretty fucking high on the richter scale), I decided to speak with her.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">In my head, I thought if the day ever came, I would charm Courtney and we would laugh like old friends; sadly, nerves got the better of me – It’s maybe the second time in my life that I have been star struck. I spoke to her, said my little piece (“I can’t think of any way to tell you, that doesn't sound contrived, but thank you for making music”) which she thanked me for. I then ran away before I could say anything foolish.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Charlotte encouraged a photo later, which I have little recollection of being taken (THANKS NERVOUS ENERGY!)</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I do remember, that as Courtney walked away I told her she smelt amazing; ‘Fracas’ by Robert Piguet. I recognise the scent because my beautiful friend Penny wears it – my memory for scent is better than any other. When I went to see the Isabella Blow clothing exhibition in London, I was perturbed that I could smell the fragrance (knowing that she too wore it); I asked a gallery assistant if Isabella’s clothing smelt of it but was reassured that it was actually for sale in the gift shop, no ghosts up my nostrils...</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The gig itself was amazing; there were old friends I hadn't expected in the room, and my love of Courtney precedes me; apparently they wondered if I would be in attendance.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Seeing Courtney solo (backed by her guitarist, acoustic) reminded me of why I fell so hard in the first place; her voice was incredible, her lyrics pierce and her banter between songs was hilarious; above everything else I love her witticisms and sense of humour (which can oft translate terribly to paper!)</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Hearing ‘Malibu‘ bought me to tears; after the gig finished I looked around and noticed several other girls had too – universally speaking, Courtney’s music speaks to people when they are at their rawest, so it was incredibly emotional and emotive to hear it live, especially in such an intimate setting.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">It was such a wonderful start to May, my 30<sup>th</sup> Birthday month, and I am so happy that I will see her again in weeks.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I think this is a good closer for this blog (both in content and significance!) and I look forward to being 30, carving out more time for creative endeavours, good things and good people.</span></span></div>
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Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-36019338803279073622013-03-01T12:57:00.001-08:002013-03-01T12:57:06.863-08:00Trying not to fall down the big bad rabbit hole of paranoia (again...)Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-33264668144021545172013-02-17T12:05:00.000-08:002013-02-17T12:05:03.730-08:00Another Beaut...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-87616855497054561932013-02-06T11:26:00.004-08:002013-02-06T11:26:51.350-08:00Syl-vee-yah...<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I heard Sylvia Plaths speaking voice for the first time last year (poignantly enough)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">She doesn't sound how I expected. Or, like anyone I have heard before. Syl-vee-yah.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Interviewed by the British Council (perhaps for the BBC?) she speaks both quickly, but manages to...chew her words, at the same time. She sounds plummy but with an air of Southern Belle. I just can't place it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white; font-weight: bold; line-height: 23px;">After being conditioned as a child to the lovely never-never land of magic, of fairy queens and virginal maidens, of little princes and their rose bushes, of poignant bears and Eyore-ish donkeys, of life personalised,</span><span style="background-color: white; font-weight: bold; line-height: 23px;"> as the pagans loved it, of the magic wand, and the faultless illustrations - the beautiful dark-haired child (who was you) winging through the midnight sky on a star-path in her mothers box of reels…all this I knew, and felt, and believed. All this was my life when I was young. To go from this to the world of “grown-up” reality…not to be sentimental, as I sound, but why the hell are we conditioned into the smooth strawberry-and-cream Mother-Goose world, Alice-in-Wonderland fable, only to be broken on the wheel as we grow older and become aware of ourselves as individuals with a dull responsibility in life?</span></span></div>
Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-11409892163706954632013-01-25T13:42:00.001-08:002013-01-25T13:42:25.111-08:00Cheburashka...<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="344" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/sICgWJ46_4E" width="459"></iframe>Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-57942428498575284172012-12-30T16:34:00.004-08:002012-12-30T16:34:23.306-08:00<br />
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<span style="color: #252525; line-height: 30px;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">"You don’t know anyone at the party, so you don’t want to go. You don’t like cottage cheese, so you haven’t eaten it in years. This is your choice, of course, but don’t kid yourself: it’s also the flinch.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Your personality is not set in stone. You may think a morning coffee is the most enjoyable thing in the world, but it’s really just a habit. Thirty days without it, and you would be fine. You think you have a soul mate, but in fact you could have had any number of spouses. You would have evolved differently, but been just as happy.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">You can change what you want about yourself at any time. You see yourself as someone who can’t write or play an instrument, who gives in to temptation or makes bad decisions, but that’s really not you. It’s not ingrained. It’s not your personality. Your personality is something else, something deeper than just preferences, and these details on the surface, you can change anytime you like.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">If it is useful to do so, you must abandon your identity and start again. Sometimes, it’s the only way.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Set fire to your old self. It’s not needed here. It’s too busy shopping, gossiping about others, and watching days go by and asking why you haven’t gotten as far as you’d like. This old self will die and be forgotten by all but family, and replaced by someone who makes a difference.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #252525;"><span style="line-height: 30px;">Your new self is not like that. Your new self is the Great Chicago Fire—overwhelming, overpowering, and destroying everything that isn't necessary.</span></span><span style="color: #252525; line-height: 30px;">"</span></span></div>
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Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-39273578736599038302012-11-28T13:17:00.003-08:002012-11-28T13:17:46.760-08:00<br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">“How the hell did I survive ANY year? You just do it. You force yourself to get up. You force yourself to put one foot before the other, and God damn it, you just refuse to let it get to you. You fight. You cry. You curse. Then you go about the business of living. That’s how I’ve done it. There’s no other way.”</span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">Elizabeth Taylor</span></div>
Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-10211218741906769182012-11-25T07:13:00.001-08:002012-11-25T07:13:39.195-08:00In anticipation of Grace Coddington's Memoir's...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 18px;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: x-large;">She says firmly, and holding my gaze: "But I was never considered beautiful anyway. I was a character. Not a beautiful blonde with blue eyes. Beauty is not about perfection. I prefer imperfections – it's much more interesting." She pauses. "Perfect is boring."</span></span></div>
Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-81435731422824077362012-11-05T15:45:00.003-08:002012-11-05T16:31:02.633-08:00<span style="font-size: x-large;">I haven't been around for a while as I have been doing a lot of thinking, a lot of getting lost inside my own head and an awful lot of this...</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">More to come soon.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">TTFN xx</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">Whitby. August 2012. La Rosa. Disposable film.</span>Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-76809686374811904372012-08-22T15:04:00.001-07:002012-08-22T15:04:18.824-07:00More eloquently put than I could muster...<br />
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“The thing about Courtney Love is that she is one of the most referenced, smart, and charismatic women I have ever met. She lights up the fucking room. I was at a party with Elizabeth Taylor and Donatella Versace, and countless other celebrities and the only person anyone was looking at was Courtney. She is just so smart and so funny. And that why talented guys like her. Talent likes talent, creative likes creative and genius likes genius. And to settle for anything less is to set yourself up for boredom.”</h3>
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— <nobr><a class="FAtxtL" href="http://kali--ma.tumblr.com/page/2#" id="FALINK_2_0_1" style="background-color: transparent !important; border-bottom-color: rgb(28, 125, 255) !important; border-bottom-style: solid !important; border-bottom-width: 1px !important; color: rgb(28, 125, 255) !important; display: inline !important; padding-bottom: 1px !important;">David</a></nobr> LaChapelle</div>
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Via <a href="http://kali--ma.tumblr.com/" style="background-color: transparent;">http://kali--ma.tumblr.com</a></div>
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Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-57738406101039560922012-08-22T15:03:00.002-07:002012-08-22T15:03:31.062-07:00Heh...<br />
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-JSUM-HRW9pY/UDVXKXIqwOI/AAAAAAAACP4/X4jnulgTsQc/s1600/Batlove.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-JSUM-HRW9pY/UDVXKXIqwOI/AAAAAAAACP4/X4jnulgTsQc/s320/Batlove.png" width="270" /></a></div>
<br />Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-40645903911319770722012-08-20T13:21:00.003-07:002012-08-20T13:21:52.801-07:00<div style="text-align: center;">
<a href="http://dogshaming.tumblr.com/">http://dogshaming.tumblr.com/</a>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-nxM0140KCtk/UDKcTWQcl9I/AAAAAAAACPg/a7l7uBXxe58/s1600/I+snack+....jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="239" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-nxM0140KCtk/UDKcTWQcl9I/AAAAAAAACPg/a7l7uBXxe58/s320/I+snack+....jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-15975610587294606182012-08-17T04:14:00.001-07:002012-08-17T04:14:32.670-07:00Pussycat...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-sOoVnWkRmtU/UC4niw2DOpI/AAAAAAAACPI/HcgSWwiQ8NI/s1600/Fleur+lash+cat.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-sOoVnWkRmtU/UC4niw2DOpI/AAAAAAAACPI/HcgSWwiQ8NI/s320/Fleur+lash+cat.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-83197102011488325232012-08-17T04:13:00.002-07:002012-08-17T04:13:06.972-07:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-f0PmthColWA/UC4nNuBy4sI/AAAAAAAACPA/0P5ecrecFQk/s1600/VOTD+Poster.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-f0PmthColWA/UC4nNuBy4sI/AAAAAAAACPA/0P5ecrecFQk/s320/VOTD+Poster.jpg" width="215" /></a></div>
<br />Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-39407353344502716812012-08-17T03:50:00.002-07:002012-08-17T03:50:58.033-07:00<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">My digital camera, which I purchased just over a year ago to document Paris, has broken!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">WOE!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I feel a little lost without it?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Through both laziness, and time constraints (and, after the busiest few weeks of this year) a photo diary of sorts would have been much easier in describing the last few months...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Not that it was a fancy camera, or I am in any way a photographer, but I think it important to capture the little details.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">As I type I am waiting for my newly polished gradient nails to dry, I want to photograph them, but I can't!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Damn.</span></div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Z7bjx68gK6Y/UC4h7ydWUQI/AAAAAAAACOo/QXD4_rhBR-I/s1600/Paul+Joe+nails.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Z7bjx68gK6Y/UC4h7ydWUQI/AAAAAAAACOo/QXD4_rhBR-I/s1600/Paul+Joe+nails.jpg" /></a></div>
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<br />Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-57413946565857619272012-08-17T03:35:00.001-07:002012-08-17T03:51:12.736-07:00''QUICKER!''<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="344" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/cJsZPaxlONA?fs=1" width="459"></iframe><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">So...I listened to a heap of other Glass Candy songs and it is this, and only this song that floats my boat.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">And, speaking of boats my BOAT BAR is in 'Bronson'. Switt swoo!</span></div>
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<br />Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-65880012834572113102012-08-17T03:20:00.001-07:002012-08-17T03:51:27.575-07:00Nay-sayer...<span style="font-size: large;">Damn!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">After nay-saying the band Glass Candy and just * not* liking them, despite them appearing on several a mix tape from my nearest and dearest friends I CAN NOT STOP LISTENING TO 'DIGITAL VERSICOLOUR'</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">I blame 'Bronson'...</span></div>
Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-64953109920983202152012-08-01T13:53:00.000-07:002012-08-17T03:51:47.910-07:00Wah wah wah...<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">I am that sort of tired that means you are constantly on the verge of tears.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Every inch of my spare time is eaten up right now, so that when I have a little fun pencil-ed in, I can't enjoy it because in the back of my mind is the never-ending 'to do' list ...</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">I love my job, but right now I resent it so much because as soon as I get back from my piddly three day holiday in the evening, I have to pack an over night bag and be on the 7.38 train the next morning.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">I am looking forward to having my remaining three wisdom teeth out on the 14th of August because it means I will have a little down time.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">I don't cope well at all when I am denied personal space and a one off lie in ... ... ...BOO!</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">I am so lucky that I work with people that I heart, because without them, I think I would crumble and I haven't seen many folk from my friendship group for weeks, and those father afield won't have heard a peep from me in bloody weeks!</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">I APOLOGISE! And, I will be in touch soon, albeit in a haze of painkillers and from the comfort of a sickbed.</span></div>
Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-89918741394324587982012-08-01T13:45:00.002-07:002012-08-17T03:52:17.749-07:00'The friend zone' I CONCUR.<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: x-small;">Via:<a href="http://kali--ma.tumblr.com/">http://kali--ma.tumblr.com/</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Everyone’s heard of friendzoning – even if they don’t know the word, they sure as hell know the concept. It’s what happens time and again to unfortunate Nice Guys who, despite being nothing but sugar and spice to the girls they love, are nonetheless denied the sexual relationships they so obviously deserve and are instead treated like platonic equals – a terrible, unfair fate spawned by the dark side of feminism.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">And if you thought even part of that statement was correct, Imma stop you right there.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">To borrow <a href="https://twitter.com/#%21/naughtynerdy/status/187723749397757952" style="color: #111111;" target="_blank">the succinct, nail-head-hitting phraseology</a> of one<a href="https://twitter.com/#!/hexjackal" style="color: #111111;" target="_blank">hexjackal</a>*:</span></div>
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<em><strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">Friendzoning is bullshit because girls are not machines that you put Kindness Coins into until sex falls out.</span></strong></em></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Dear Hypothetical Interlocutor whose hackles just bristled with the unfairness of that statement; who thinks that girls can be in the Friend Zone, too, and that therefore this point is both invalid and reverse-sexist into the bargain. For your edification, I would like to submit the following definitions of the term Friend Zone as supplied by <a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=friend+zone" style="color: #111111;" target="_blank">Urban Dictionary</a>:</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">1. “The ‘friend zone’ is like the penalty box of dating, only you can never get out. Once a girl decides you’re her ‘friend’, it’s game over. You’ve become a <nobr><a class="FAtxtL" href="http://kali--ma.tumblr.com/#" id="FALINK_1_0_0" style="background-color: transparent !important; border-bottom-color: rgb(28, 125, 255) !important; border-bottom-style: solid !important; border-bottom-width: 1px !important; color: rgb(28, 125, 255) !important; display: inline !important; padding-bottom: 1px !important;">complete</a></nobr>non-sexual entity in her eyes, like her brother, or a lamp.” – Ryan Reynolds in Just Friends.</span></div>
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<em><span style="font-size: x-small;">‘I’ve been locked in the friend zone with her since high school!’</span></em></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">2. A state of being where a male inadvertently becomes a ‘platonic friend’ of an attractive female who he was trying to intiate a romantic relationship. Females have been rumored to arrive in the Friend Zone, but <nobr><a class="FAtxtL" href="http://kali--ma.tumblr.com/#" id="FALINK_3_0_2" style="background-color: transparent !important; border-bottom-color: rgb(28, 125, 255) !important; border-bottom-style: solid !important; border-bottom-width: 1px !important; color: rgb(28, 125, 255) !important; display: inline !important; padding-bottom: 1px !important;">reports</a></nobr>are unsubstantiated.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Girl: <em>“I love you (Insert the poor bastard’s name here,) but I dont want to ruin a great friendship by dating you.” </em></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Guy: <em>“Well why the fuck did I waste two months on you?”</em></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">and <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Friend_zone" style="color: #111111;" target="_blank">Wikipedia</a>:</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">There are differing explanations about what causes the friend zone. One report suggests that some women don’t see their male friends as potential love interests because they fear that deepening their relationship might cause a loss of the romance and mystery or lead to rejection later…</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Dating adviser Ali Binazir described the friend zone as <em><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/-stan" style="color: #111111;" target="_blank" title="-stan">Justfriendistan</a></em>, and wrote that it’s a “territory only to be rivaled in inhospitability by the western Sahara, the Atacama desert, and Dante’s Ninth Circle of Hell.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">I therefore submit to you, Hypothetical Interlocutor, that the Friend Zone is not an equal opportunities habitat. It is where men go – or more accurately, where men <em>perceive themselves to go</em> – when women fail to reward their friendship with sex. Or, to quote<a href="http://buildingmosaicsoutoflife.tumblr.com/post/16490480707/slut-is-how-we-vilify-a-woman-for-exercising-her" style="color: #111111;" target="_blank">the immortal wisdom of the internet</a>:</span></div>
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<em><span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong>Slut</strong> is how we vilify a woman for exercising her right to say <strong>yes</strong>.</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong>Friendzone</strong> is how we vilify a woman for exercising her right to say<strong> no</strong>.</span></em></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Here’s the thing, Hypothetical Interlocutor: if you truly are a self-professed Nice Guy (and I strongly suspect that you are), then you probably espouse the belief that women and men are equal. More than espouse – you believe! You know! Except that, somewhere along the line, you’ve got it into your head that if you’re romantically interested in a girl who sees you only as a friend, her failure to reciprocate your feelings is just that: <em>a failing</em>. That because you’re nice and treat her well, she therefore owes you at least one opportunity to present yourself as a viable sexual candidate, even if she’s already made it clear that this isn’t what she wants. That because she legitimately enjoys a friendship that you find painful (and which you’re under no obligation to continue), she is using you. That if a man wants more than friendship with a woman, then the friendship itself doesn’t even attain the status of a consolation prize, but is instead viewed as hell: a punishment to be endured because, so long as he thinks she owes him that golden opportunity, he is bound to persist in an association that hurts him – not because he cares about the friendship, but because he feels he’s invested too much kindness not to stick around for the (surely inevitable, albeit delayed) payoff.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">And if she never sleeps with him? Then she’s a bitch.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">I cannot state this clearly enough: if you really believe in equality, then you have to acknowledge the fact that women have a right to say no. That no matter how pure and true your feelings, your ladylove is under no obligation whatever to reciprocate them, because friendship is not a business transaction, and <em>women are allowed to want male friends</em>. Yes, it is difficult and sad and heartbreaking to love someone who doesn’t love you back, and doubly so when that person is a friend. Believe me; I speak from experience. This is not a fun thing to endure! But discounting the woman as a bitch, a user, a timewaster, a whore with no taste who only wants to sleep with arseholes instead of Nice Guys like you is<em>not on</em>. It is pure, unadulterated sexism: the attitude that friendship with a woman is only ever a stepping-stone to getting into her pants, such that if the pants-getting is off the table, then so too is the friendship.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Which, frankly, is bullshit. If you don’t care enough about someone to enjoy their company and respect their decisions when sex is off the table, then that person is right not to sleep with you, because enjoying someone’s company and respecting their decisions is pretty much how sex gets <em>on</em> the table to start with.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">To quote the single best point in <a href="http://www.cracked.com/article_19785_5-ways-modern-men-are-trained-to-hate-women.html" style="color: #111111;" target="_blank">an otherwise deeply problematic<em>Cracked</em> piece</a>:</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">What we learned as kids is that we males are each owed, and will eventually be awarded, a beautiful woman. We were told this by every movie, TV show, novel, comic book, video game and song we encountered…</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">In each case, the woman has no say in this — compatibility doesn’t matter, prior relationships don’t matter, nothing else factors in. If the hero accomplishes his goals, he is awarded his favorite female. Yes, there will be dialogue that maybe makes it sound like the woman is having doubts, and she will make noises like she is making the decision on her own. But we, as the audience, know that in the end the hero will “get the girl,” just as we know that at the end of the month we’re going to “get our paycheck.” Failure to award either is breaking a societal contract. The girl can say what she wants, but we all know that at the end, she <em>will</em> wind up with the hero, whether she knows it or not.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">And now you see the problem. From birth we’re taught that we’re <em>owed</em> a beautiful girl. We all think of ourselves as the hero of our own story, and we all (whether we admit it or not) think we’re heroes for just getting through our day.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">So it’s very frustrating, and I mean frustrating to the point of violence, when we don’t get what we’re owed. A contract has been broken. These women, by exercising their own choices, are denying it to us. It’s why every Nice Guy is shocked to find that buying gifts for a girl and doing her favors won’t win him sex. It’s why we go to “slut” and “whore” as our default insults — we’re not mad that women enjoy sex. We’re mad that women are distributing to other people the sex that they owed <em>us</em>.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">In pop culture, girls who crush hopelessly on guys they can’t have are painted as just that – hopeless. Over and over again, we’re taught that girls who openly express sexual or romantic interest in guys who don’t want them are pitiable, stalkerish, desperate, crazy bitches. More often than not, they’re also portrayed as ugly – whether physically, emotionally or both – in order to further establish their undesirability as an objective fact. Both narratively and, as a consequence, in real life, men are given free reign to snub, abuse, mislead and talk down to such women: we’re raised to believe that female desire is unseemly, so that any consequent shaming is therefore deserved. There is no female-equivalent Friend Zone terminology because, in the language of our culture, a man’s romantic choices are considered sacrosanct and inviolable. If a girl has been told no, then she has only herself to blame for anything that happens next – but if a woman says no, then she must not really mean it. Or, if she does, she shouldn’t: the rejected man is a universally sympathetic figure, and everyone from moviegoers to platonic onlookers will scream at her to just<em>give him a chance, </em>as though her rejection must always be unfounded rather than based on the fact that he <em>had</em> a chance, and blew it. And even then, give him another one! The pathos of Single Nice Guys can only be eased by pity-sex with unwilling women that blossoms into romance!</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Well, screw that. The Friend Zone is a fundamentally sexist construction based solely on the idea that women should be penalised for putting their own romantic happiness above that of an interested man. If a lady doesn’t want you, then either respect her decision and keep away to salve your heart, or respect her decision and stay because you still think she’s cool enough to be worth the effort of friendship. But if you don’t respect her decision, then you don’t respect her – and if you don’t respect her, then stay the fuck out of her life.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">*Amendment, 11 April 2012: Originally, the first quote in this piece was attributed to Aeryn Walker. However, she has since<a href="http://fozmeadows.tumblr.com/post/20924223689/hi-that-quote-you-have-posted-is-not-from-me-it-is" style="color: #111111;" target="_blank">informed me</a> that the kindness/coins line originated with @hexjackal, and though I don’t have the exact reference for that first attribution, I’ve nonetheless changed it in the text. </span></div>
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Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-30275935522476318722012-07-15T10:51:00.003-07:002012-07-15T10:51:42.283-07:00The Mary Blair Treasury of Golden Books ...<div style="text-align: center;">
...Is released on August 15th!</div>
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Naturally, I can not wait.</div>
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It's set to include material that has been out of print for years so there will be lots to discover.</div>
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And, everyone I know with children will be gifted a copy come Christmas time!</div>
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<br /></div>Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-45120740984061355772012-07-15T10:09:00.002-07:002012-07-15T10:09:36.764-07:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Uu1D01TrXvs/UAL5Cg9iieI/AAAAAAAACOQ/vkVerpW6-2c/s1600/Disney+paper+dolls.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="241" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Uu1D01TrXvs/UAL5Cg9iieI/AAAAAAAACOQ/vkVerpW6-2c/s320/Disney+paper+dolls.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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I loved paper dolls when I was a child; I guess I still do now!</div>
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These are so lovely, Pre 70's Disney aesthetics tick all my boxes.</div>Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-54499789294914795782012-07-15T10:04:00.001-07:002012-07-15T10:04:19.495-07:00Oz...<div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/YhLaBpvS7os?fs=1" width="480"></iframe></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">I am VERY much looking forward to this *GLINDAGLINDAGLINDA* and 'Maleficent'</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">SWOON!</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div>Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-22224038247361184802012-07-14T16:57:00.001-07:002012-07-14T16:57:17.798-07:00Dolls...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-V4Q12x-h1Ro/UAIHD0lG3yI/AAAAAAAACOE/HaoHV3fYMcY/s1600/DOLLS.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="259" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-V4Q12x-h1Ro/UAIHD0lG3yI/AAAAAAAACOE/HaoHV3fYMcY/s320/DOLLS.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">I saw this & VALLEY OF THE DOLLS springs to mind...and, if I were to choose a picture to represent me...this would be a close contender!</span></div>Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-45345502543730122532012-07-14T13:07:00.002-07:002012-07-14T13:07:47.768-07:00Concerning Margot Tenenbaum.......<br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><b>Concerning Margot Tenenbaum</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">“The brand of cigarettes Margot smokes throughout the movie were only sold in Ireland and were discontinued in the 1970s. According to director Wes Anderson in the DVD insert (detailing all of the setting and props and the reasons why he used them) this was intentional, both because of the theme of the 1970s and to make Margot’s secret smoking habit just a little stranger.”</span></div>
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<br /></div>Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1421573238340963869.post-70345542715764827712012-07-07T05:52:00.001-07:002012-07-07T05:52:17.449-07:00Cat...Love and loathe in equal measures.......Hmm, more so loathe.<br />
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<a href="http://www.vice.com/read/amphetamine-logic-blonde-on-very-famous-blonde-lindsay-lohan-versus-cat-marnell-le-bain">http://www.vice.com/read/amphetamine-logic-blonde-on-very-famous-blonde-lindsay-lohan-versus-cat-marnell-le-bain</a>Gladys Badhandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13907052159131542632noreply@blogger.com0